How to improve and grow in any area of life

The eternal question, and the concept of lean human

I'll never forget my first time surfing. I paddled my awkward foam board, turned to face shore. A wave approached. I prepared to stand and...faceplant. My board went flying, and I came up sputtering salt water.

A few years later, I read “Lean Startup.” The essence of the book is that startups maximize growth by testing, learning, and iterating quickly.

I thought — why can't this apply to personal life?

That's the concept I call “lean human.”

The lean human formula is:

In this article, I’ll explain to you how to maximize these three variables.

The formula to more success in life

Let's use learning to surf as an example [1]. If we refer to the formula, to become a skilled surfer, you need to:

1. Maximize time spent in water

2. Get feedback on your sessions

3. Luck

Maximizing experiences means spending as much time in the ocean as possible. Take lessons, surf different breaks, go on surf trips.

Maximizing feedback means reflecting after each surf session.

Luck means happening to be in the water when the waves are good.

How to maximize experiences

The best way to maximize experiences is to make decisions fast. And it means conscious decisions. Ones that are clear in your mind. Like deciding to quit your job, start talking to strangers or take pottery classes.

Basically, live as many things you want to live as possible.

Decisions allow you to live experiences.

Experiences allow you to build skills and understand yourself.

Skills allow you to grow. Self-understanding allows you to find fulfillment.

How to get feedback on your life

Now say you've had some surf sessions. You can ask your surf buddies:

• "What can I improve on?"

• "Why did I pearl on that wave?"

Listen to their feedback. Was it poor paddle technique? Bad positioning? Rushing to pop up?

Based on feedback, you can conclude what to refine: paddling strength, wave judgment, patience.

What if your friends praise your surfing? Great.

Ask yourself:

• What made my surfing good? Style, wave choice, etc.

• Were there moments that felt like real flow?

• What specifically did they appreciate about my surfing?

We've highlighted two types of feedback. The first is external and the second is internal.

External feedback will speed up your learning

External feedback comes from outside. It shows you clearly what you're bad at.

If you start surfing and get wiped out by every wave, you’ll know you suck. Getting a surf coach can even speed up external feedback.

With external feedback, you don’t need self-reflection to realize you need to improve.

That’s why for each experience, maximize external feedback.

Internal feedback requires self-reflection

Internal feedback comes from experiences where life or people don't give you direct feedback.

For example, it's much easier to improve your surfing than your career. Feedback loops are more subtle for your career. And even if you do get feedbacks, you might miss them. That’s because some experiences require more internal reflection.

That's what we call “repeating the same mistakes”.

Like leaving your consulting job for another just for the salary bump. When you don't like consulting in the first place.

That's why that one is harder.

It takes time and a good amount of introspection to understand what you like, what skills you're good at, whether you want to work for yourself or in a company, etc.

If external feedback is scarce, be patient with yourself, and accept repeating mistakes as you self-reflect.

Listen to signals, and your intuition.

How to get lucky

With that one, I can’t help you. Maybe some people are more lucky than others. Maybe some people will often be free when the waves are great. Or get unique career opportunities when they need them.

But it’s not all lost. You can maximize your chance to attract luck.

So how do you maximize luck? I believe it’s by maximizing experiences, actually. Luck and experiences correlate.

Paul Graham said in his essay, “How to Do Great Work”

Here’s a FREE Notion template to help you keep track of the experience / feedback cycle

This year, I want to be more intentional. If you want to dive deeper too, here is a template I made to help you journal on your lean human journey.

• In the experiences table, list all the experiences you wish to try this year. Aim for 3 experiences per topic.

• In the feedback table, fill what you’ve learned about these experiences over time, and how will you act differently in the future.

Let me know if you find this exercise useful in the comments/as a reply!

TL;DR:

1. Make decisions quickly to drive experiences

2. Always look for external feedback loops

3. Develop your self-reflection

4. Watch skills and success compound

5. Keep track of the process to make it more intentional.

That's how you become a lean human.

I'm starting coaching

Every person I know tells me I should start coaching — often after a few glasses of wine though.

I’m finally confident enough to do it.

That’s why I’m starting to take coaching calls in 2024.

For custom guidance, schedule a coaching session with me here.

[1] I am not a surfing expert nor is my surfing skill exemplary. I'm using this analogy for clarity and relatability.